Sunday, May 30, 2010

sunday may 30, 2010


today has been a roller coaster of emotions. A newlywed of 24 dies suddenly of a heart attack, a sister dies in an accident and then, to the opposite extreme, the extreme of joy and happiness, our friends' son put tefillin on for the first time and we danced at a bat mitzva. from somber to happy and back. the whole circle of life, things happen for a reason...blah blah blah. sometimes, life just sucks and isn't fair and sometimes, hopefully, more times, life is awesome and should be appreciated. even with all of my negativity...i do appreciate life, and as i have said before, life is too short to be full of crap. say what you mean, mean what you say, love who you want and ignore who you don't. and for gods sake, smile and laugh more.... i am done philosophizing...lets get down to business.....

at the bat mitzva, we saw an old friend of ours who is now a plastic surgeon. i had a whole discussion with him about my "turkey neck" surgery that i want to have done in 10 years and 5 months...we discussed payment plans, etc etc. but i started to wonder if when he looks at women (and men for that matter) does he start thinking "first, lipo...from everywhere,,,,then, botox, just a little...hmmm, what about those laugh lines-should i got with restalin or natural fat from her big butt....decisions, decisions... definitely something done with that stomach...a touch off the upper arms...." they must looks at our flaws in an entirely different way than we look at them....they see dollar signs, and we see...what do we see? my mother always says if we could see ourselves the way that others see us....but then she never finishes....i guess there is a reason for that.

for example, yesterday, i was sitting with 4 other women and we were having a discussion about maternity now, they are so tight you can see the fetus moving around. one of them said "gee, i am so glad they weren't in style when i was pregnant...." now, the four of these women combined probably weigh less than i do, and i am not even being self deprecating-these women are so skinny they practically disappear when they stand sideways...and THEY are complaining about how tight the clothes are. HELLO!!!!!! if i were pregnant now...i would have to make my own clothes to fit no one ever really sees themselves for how they really are...i guess, unless they just felt bad for me and were trying to make me feel better about being the biggest one at the table....(ok, that was self-deprecating...)

we should all be able to look in the mirror and be happy with what we see, be happy with where we are, what we say and how we act. we can only be responsible for ourselves and what we do with the gifts that god gave us. sometimes, the things that come out of my mouth might put people off, might give them a bad impression and to those people i say....too freakin bad :) as the famous song says "i am what i am and what i am needs no excuses...."

happy sunday...may we only know from happiness and good health....

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