Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Wednesday, January 27,2010

12 years ago today, I weighed 250 is that for a visual?

Things you never want to see.....

Just came back from the Great Wolf Lodge. That is another idea I wish I would have thought indoor waterpark. We have been going since it opened and it is still clean, the rooms are still in great shape and the place is really holding up well, it is actually holding up better than some of its guests!!

Ahh..the bathing suit parade. Since it is "yeshiva week" we got to see the latest in waterproof shabbos robe fashion. They come in all colors, all sizes and apparently, they throw in a matching snood! (also waterproof!) Now I totally approve of these waterproof robes, because most of the women wearing them, should not be walking around in a bathing suit to begin with. Now before any of you comment on the pot-calling-the-kettle-black, I did not even bring a bathing suit. I did not want to scare anyone, and I didn't want any hunters coming after me with a harpoon. I know my place and it is not in any form of bathing apparel-one piece, two really big pieces or otherwise...

Then, there were the pregnant women, in bathing suits. I feel that if you can see the fetus actually moving, you are wearing something that is too tight. There were some women there who pulled off the whole "hey I'm pregnant, can't you tell?" look (like my friend whose initials are LAF....) But then there were others who were pregnant from the front, the side, the back, the top and the bottom. Perhaps a cover up would have been appropriate but, who am I to judge...

All in all, it was an enjoyable 24 hours..the kids had fun, which was the most important thing of all and I got to see some people who are fatter than me, which might even be more important than the kids having a good time.

Off to Miami tomorrow night for the chai lifeline half marathon with Jack.

Happy Wednesday....will blog again if we survive the 13.1 miles!!

Monday, January 25, 2010

January 25, 2010

vacation is what you make of it

I live in a community where everyone complains how expensive everything is.."oh, tuition is so expensive"...but then they do an addition to their house..."camp is so expensive"...and then they lease a pricey automobile..."life is so expensive, I can barely make ends meet..." and then, winter vacation comes, and all of these people who complain about how expensive life is...end up in the bahamas, or on a cruise, or in colorado, or on an african safari, or in the caribbean or on a chartered expedition to the moon...

And that is fine. I don't care how anyone else spends their money-they should all live in good health and do whatever they want...not my business,not my problem. I have my own problems and wouldn't trade with anyone else...

So today, another vacation day where I need to find something for my children to do so they don't spend the whole day at home playing some sort of video game, we decide to go bowling. We pile in the car and take the windy and rainy trip to Bowler City-a mecca of suburban entertainment. We get there, and lo and behold, all of the other po' folk from my community are bowling,,well, they weren't all from my community, I think a couple snuck in from Brooklyn or Monsey or Poland, not sure, but they could've been from Poland...they were speaking we aren't in the sun and fun-we are going to bowl and we are going to enjoy it. We wait on line while the family in front of us tries to convince the poor guy behind the counter that 10 kids only do need one will be fine..oy-freakin-vey.

It is finally our turn...the nice man behind the counter hands me a ticket with a number on it and says "wait for us to call you." Huh??? am I in a bakery? no, I am at freakin bowler city and I have to wait to be called.(and after I am called, I can't even order a donut).. I have to wait for Yaakov and his 12 sons to finish bowling so we can have a turn.

This is what is known as adding INSULT to INJURY. Not only am I not with my family on a beach, on a boat, or on the moon, I am waiting to B O W L. But I remained calm with a big smile on my face (one of the kids we were with was not my own and I wanted him to think that I was a happy friendly mom, not a scary psychotic mom) and waited my turn.

We bowled, we laughed, Jonah and Matthew started fighting, Jack needed a drink, I needed a zanax but it was quality family time for less than 50 dollars. So really, who needs the moon? who needs to see lions and tigers in their natural habitat...Bowler City is a habitat all its own.

And now my kids are safe and sound at home....playing with their video games.

Happy Monday!

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Sunday, January 24, 2010

lifetime television for women

I have an addiction. Aside from the addictions that some of you know about, I am also addicted to Lifetime television. While my husband and sons watch football, a game that I don't understand and truly do not enjoy, I am downstairs, in my bunker, watching compelling dramas "Not with my Daughter"...."The Stranger down the Street".."The Stranger with my Daughter"...."Pregnant at 16"....and today, I am in the middle of watching one of the more compelling "The Pregnancy Pact." It is both riveting and heartbreaking all at the same time. The men are upstairs hoping the Jets will lose (sorry Jets fans) I don't know why they want the jets to lose, but as a joke, I came downstairs wearing Ari's old Jets jersey and they all yelled at me to take it off because I will jinx the game....and jews aren't supposed to be superstitious....

Back to my seems that all actors and actresses that once had reasonably successful tv careers end up in a lifetime television movie. I think that Tori Spelling has been in about 5 or 6 of breaks my heart that that girl hasn't been nominated for an emmy...what a shame. She is a true talent. In the pregnancy pact, Camryn Manheim of "The Practice" has a major role. She looks pretty good, has lost a bunch of weight and removed many of the earrings she used to wear. I am looking forward to going back down to the bunker, get a big pile of laundry to fold and find out how this drama ends...will they all have their babies? was it really a pact? I can't wait to find out!!

Good Luck Vikings and Happy Sunday.....will blog about my weekend as a mother of twins tomorrow...too tired right now....

Thursday, January 21, 2010

January 21, 2010

i am so tired

I love my brother. We have always been close. We have always done things over the years to help eachother out. We don't have to speak on the phone all the time to know that we would do anything for eachother. So when he said that he and Amy(his wife, who I also love) wanted to go away and would I watch Claire and Brody, his 21 month old twins, I was more than happy to agree. Ari also agreed because he knew he would be at work.

Amy gave me a schedule....Brody wakes up at 6:45, has a bowl of Life cereal and then goes back to bed. He drinks a box of vanilla milk with his cereal. Claire wakes up at 7:45 and is very agreeable and will eat anything(clearly, she takes after Aunt Banji..the eating part, not the agreeable part...)

So Aunt Banji buys 7 boxes of life cereal and a whole bunch of the milk boxes.

Brody wakes up at 5:15....he doesn't want Life cereal...he doesn't drink the milk....I am writing this at 2:45 pm, half asleep and he hasn't even had 1/2 of the goshdarn milk box....Amy also said they need to nap...put them in earlier if they wake up early....they didn't nap. Took them for a 45 minute walk, they didn't fall my mother is here entertaining them. She is doing a great job....
perhaps that is because she hasn't been up since 5:15...

The question was I able to raise three kids until they were old enough to sleep through the night? I am so tired I can't even see straight. I know why, it is because I was younger then....not so young now.

Wish me luck....Jed and Amy come back on Sunday.....

Sorry this one wasn't so amusing....Happy what day is it? oh, happy thursday...

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

January 19, 2010

pudgie, chubby, fat and beyond.....

It is no secret that I have always had issues with my weight. It started when I was younger and I had the pleasure of having an older sister (6 years older) who was blonde and skinny and perfect. My brother and I were not built the same way. Unfortunately. Our winning personalities and sense of humors were what kept us from being social pariahs (either that, or our friends were just afraid of us sitting on them...)

My mom used to buy entenmanns chocolate chip cookies for my sister. She would hide them on top of the refrigerator (great place to hide something from two chubby kids who were always near that same refrigerator.) She and my dad would go out. My sister would be studying in her closet (yes, she is smart too) and my brother and I would go to work. The entenmanns boxes in the 70's were easy to break into. All you had to do was go in through the side, bend the box a little at the perforation and you were in. We would quickly devour most of the contents. Replace the box and wait until the next day when my mom would try to figure out how an unopened box of cookies was practically empty....I still smile when I think of that look.

My dad has always joked that he wanted to write a book called "How I lost 1000 pounds," because over the course of a lifetime, someone who has issues with weight can gain and lose and gain and lose about that much. When I was 9 months pregnant with Jack (and Jonah..was MUCH thinner with Matthew) I was also weight-eligible to box in the heavyweight division or play professional football. I take full responsibilty for living on marshmallow iced devils food cake and tuna melt pizzas(dont ask, it will make you nauseous...)I fell madly in love with the man who gave me my epidural because anyone who can find that little, tiny spot on the back of a very, very large and cranky woman is a true hero in my book!!

Gain and lose, gain and lose....I spin my brains out, walk for miles, but food is love. The reason I write about this today is because I have hit bottom. Those with weak stomachs should stop reading now...I am going to confess my sin....

I had the pleasure of tasting something called Almond Roca buttercrunch. It was so good that I ordered some online. 96 pieces. 70 calories a pop. I got them on Thursday. They are all gone. I would need to walk to Chicago to burn those babies off. Am I embarrased? I probably should be, but tomorrow, I will go back on the wagon, the wheels might break, but that is where I will be.

Skinny people just don't get it. We all end up in the same hole in the ground...mine will just have to be a little bigger :)

Happy Tuesday and wish me luck. Nothing tastes as good as thin feels! (except for maybe peanut m&ms....)

Monday, January 18, 2010

January 18, 2010

you get what you pay for.

We were out of tissues. Big crisis in my house. Jonah needs his tissues for his room, Matthew needs his tissues for his room, Ari needs his tissues for shabbos (I mean we ALL use only tissues on shabbos...just making a clarification.) So off to the supermarket for the 50th time last week, I went to buy tissues. Wrote down tissues, because if I didn't, because of my age and failing memory and all, I would have forgotten tissues. (which is what happened initially and the reason why we were all out of tissues and not just down to the last few tissues.)

Anyway, so there I am in the supermarket on a quest for tissues. The tissues we had been using were the costco brand that I had borrowed from my parents supply (after all, since they are cutting me off from my cell phone, I can certainly not feel guilty about borrowing some tissues. Notice the word BORROW...would steal be more correct? ...)I am now standing in the tissue aisle. Which tissues should I buy? hmmm..some are two dollars a box, some are a dollar twenty five a box..wait,wait wait...what have we here? These tissues are only 49 cents a box-49 cents for 86 tissues (the other boxes are also 86 count) and it says they are two-ply!! Two-ply is better than one-ply as my family discovered with one-ply toilet paper-NEVER AGAIN, don't care if they are giving that stuff away for free..

So there I was, with 8 boxes of 86 count two-ply tissues for 49 cents a box. Ari is going to be so proud of me. I just saved a bundle....

Well, the story doesn't end well. 49 cent tissues, two ply or not, are really, really bad. We are talking worse than the one-ply toilet paper bad. Don't even know what these tissues are made out of-gravel? who knows...very, very bad. And then I notice the brand name....marquis....wasn't the marquis de sade known for torture? Funny joke, but the joke is on me, and my kids noses' and tushies.....not so funny.

Back to stealing from the folks....
Happy Monday!

Saturday, January 16, 2010

January 16, 2010

what do I have in common with my parents house (and it isn't how much we weigh.....)

So my parents moved into their house 5 days before I was born. Technically, chronologically, we are the same age. The house and me. Every year, on my birthday, my mom tells me the story of how she was in labor with me, my sister was throwing up and she was trying to teach my grandfather how to use the washing machine.

This weekend I had the opportunity to spend some time there...and I had a revelation..I hope you enjoy it.

The house looks great from the outside, maybe needs a little paint-and so do I!!

The house's plumbing is not quite what it used to be...a little hard to get it started, but once it works, it works great-hey....the same with my plumbing!! (enough said..)

The house creaks a bones creak a little, not as easy to jump out of bed as it used to be when I still lived in that house...

My mattress in my old bedroom is starting to sag...ok, we don't have that in common, because I started to sag YEARS ago (tmi...but that is what makes for a healthy blogging relationship!)

The house has a nice comfortable feel to it...and yes, I am quite comfortable. I am convinced that the reason why my son's friends like to hug me is because I am the only mom that
has something to hug (I am complimenting the other moms...)

The house is still inviting and lived in....I am...sometimes inviting and totally lived in.

After this weekend, I really feel a lot closer to the house that I grew up in. I lived there, on and off for almost 24 years...and we have been through a lot together. And now we share the same aches and pains. The same moans and groans....but, we both have a lot of love in our lives and that is what makes a house a home and me....

lucky. very, very lucky.

Here's wishing the Vikings good luck tomorrow!!

Friday, January 15, 2010

January 15, 2010

omg..i can't believe we are really doing it.

Over a year ago, a good friend of mine did the chai lifeline half marathon in Las Vegas. I asked Jack if he would want to do it for his bar mitzva chesed project and he said "People get shot in Las Vegas, let's do the one in Miami." I am not sure where he got his crime statistics from....but in two weeks we are doing the half marathon in Miami. We got our information packets in the mail today and I cannot believe that over a year has gone by since we had the initial discussion. I am so proud of him. Thanks to our friends and family, we have raised almost 8 thousand dollars for a really amazing organization.

But here is what is freaking me out...well, a few things. The shuttle to the race leaves at 4:30 in the morning....4:30 IN THE MORNING!!!!!! 4:30 isn't the morning, it is the night. What the hell are these race people thinking??? How am i expected to finish 13.1 miles, if I have to get up in the middle of the night?!?!?!?!

The second thing is that Jack and I have to complete the 13.1 miles in less than 4 hours, or they close the finish line. Well, what happens if we are having a particularly slow morning? After all, we didn't get much sleep the night before, if they close the finish line, how will we know where to go?? Does that mean we just never finish and keep on going? I am supposed to be the responsible parent on this trip(because Ari isn't coming with us) and I am already nervous that we wont finish in time, we will never get back to the hotel, miss our flights and be stranded in Miami. Now, Jack probably will think that this is a good thing because he is hoping that both he and the Vikings will be in Miami for the, I am not thinking those same thoughts.

But in two weeks, we will, GOD Willing, be in Miami. Just me and Jack...on an adventure. We hopefully finish all 13.1 miles without killing ourselves or eachother. I told him that we should syn our ipods so we can listen to the same music at the same time, but I think we will just end up talking about sports for the whole race (he will talk, I will listen)....and I just can't wait. I can't imagine that he will want to spend another weekend alone in Miami with his mom, that is, of course, until his wife won't come with him to visit me when I am living there in my retirement years.....

Have a great weekend!

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

January 13,2010

walking the track

There is a track in Teaneck that I walk around and around and around. I haven't actually gotten anywhere yet, but it is a nice, calm atmosphere. You see different people there in the winter and in the summer. In the winter, it seems, that votee park is a rest stop for the canadian geese. Hundreds of them hang out, eating, pooping(which is why i am always looking down when I walk) making friends. They seem to be having a wonderful time. I often wonder if they tell eachother about this particular park..because every winter it is the same story.

Anyway, I think there is some sort of unspoken ettiquete (how do you spell that?) at the votee track. Just like when you are in an elevator, you make eye contact once, nod, and then stare at the numbers going up or down, there is track etiquette. You pass the person, if you know them from walks passed, it's a friendly "hi, how are you?" but then the next time you pass them, no eye contact. Why is that? I have no idea.

If it's someone you don't know, I usually smile and say "hey" 50-50 on if they acknowledge me or not, next time around, I get nothing. But that is ok. It's like when you walk around town...I always try to say hello and smile-never know what kind of response I am going to get. Sometimes I feel that I am so skinny I am practically invisible, because I will say hello and it's as if the person can't even see me!! (who knew I was so thin??)

So the moral of this blog is give a smile, say hello and bring us closer to the coming of the messiah!

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

January 12, 2010

i can't do anything right

Jack has decided that he wants to go to shul with Ari at 6 am so Ari can take him for a hot chocolate afterwards. It seems Jack has learned that he can't eat or drink anything before he prays. Who taught him this? Is it even true? Are all those people who eat and drink before they pray going to hell? Isn't it more important that he listens to his mother when she tells him to clean his room? Or for him to be nicer to Jonah? Apparently not.

So I tell Jack that if he goes to sleep at 10, he can go to pray at 6. Oh boy, what am i CRAZY?!?!? How did I suggested such a thing..bad bad mom. So mom, the schmuck, says that she will bring her prince Jack hot chocolate to school to coincide with the end of prayers....she will take time out of her busy schedule of ironing, eating and watching law & order, to go to dunkin donuts, buy him a hot chocolate and quickly and safely deliver it to his school.

"It won't be hot anymore," is what I won't be hot anymore...are you kidding me?? Not thank you, you are the best mom ever, not "wow, I am the luckiest kid in the world to have a mom like you..." it won't be hot anymore....

I ask him about all of the hot chocolate we have in the house..."that is all disgusting, I can't drink that stuff..." we have nestle, and hershey's and carmel and rasberry and dark chocolate and milk chocolate and white, it's all disgusting. I bought him whipped cream because he told me, that's disgusting also. Seriously....are you kidding me?

So let's fast forward to this morning...cute, adorable Jack comes bounding down the stairs, with his incredible Ganchrow grin and says "so what time will you be bringing me my hot chocolate??" I am not kidding.

I hope the poor kid survived without it.

Monday, January 11, 2010

January 11, 2010

little things mean a lot.

What made you happy when you were younger? Presents, birthday parties, baked goods(those still make me happy),having a best friend, having a boy you liked call you...the simple things in life..but those things were really important back then. Fast forward to now, and you are just happy if you can pay tuition AND buy milk for the family

Anyway, I want to share with you what makes me happy now. Getting things for free. It doesn't even matter what it is....and now I will tell you about the package that came in the mail today that made me smile.

Two months ago, before Ari and I went on the love boat, I went to target to buy him some new undergarments (classier than writing panties??) anyway....I bought him the size he needed-can I tell you what that is or is that crossing a line? So we will say he needed a 32. My slim, trim husband needed a 32. Brought them home, he opens them up and OOPS, though it said 32 ON the package, the undies IN the package are a 30...too small. Didn't have time to return them, so I just did a few more loads of laundry so I wouldn't have to do laundry on the boat. Getting to the point of the story...

Called Hanes when we got back and told them the situation...told me they would send my new ones. Great, Fantastic..would take 6-8 weeks (didn't know it took that long to make 6 pairs of underwear, but whatever...) Went back to target and returned the underwear(got my credit)...and today, 6-8 weeks the new FREE ones in the mail.

Yes folks, the highlight of my day-it might even be the highlight of my week, but I will have to let you know.

Here's hoping that your underwear always fits and that free things come your way.
Happy Monday!

Sunday, January 10, 2010

January 10,2010


I have a confession. In June 1992, my parents got me a cell phone as a college graduation present. It weighed about 20 pounds, but it served its purpose. I was going to be starting graduate school and my parents wanted me to have a phone in case my car broke down or some other sort of non-emergency emergency occured. It was a great present. It is now January 2010 and my parents have just informed me that after my present cell phone contract is up in February, they are cutting me off. Could you believe the chuzpa? After paying my cell phone bill for almost 18 years, they are finally cutting me off. I thought it was the gift that was going to keep on giving.

What scares me, is that I might have to learn how to text now. Currently, I am not able to text because my parents wouldn't pay for texting (again-chutzpa!!) but when I join onto Ari's plan, I might have texting. I don't want to text, I like talking on the phone, and I like e mailing, the whole texting this doesn't work for me. I am too old for it. And I just don't get it. If I were a kid, I could see the joy in the immediate gratification of texting my friends, but as an adult, I am just not into it. My friends who have begged me to get texting will just have to forgive me for wanting to hear their beautiful voices on the phone.

Though I totally appreciate today's technology-I mean, where would I be without facebook? I have to say, that I am glad we didn't have it when I was younger, because, without a doubt, I would have been a cyber stalker. This is another confession. On my first day of high school, I saw a boy that I fell madly in love with. I thought he was the most beautiful boy in the whole world. I left him an anonymous note in his locker saying that I loved him. And then there were the phone calls to his house....ring ring "hello?" and I would hang up. Fortunately, his parents didn't have caller id, or I might've been arrested. But if we had internet then? and texting? and e mail? and facebook? and twitter? It would have been disasterous.

So when my plan ends in February, I am on my own. Another indication that I am getting older(like I really needed another indication of that fact....)

Any recommendations? Can I just get a can with a string attached to it?...ahh, the good old days...

Happy Sunday.

Friday, January 8, 2010

January 8, 2010-1 year til jonah's bar mitzva


Hair is a sensitive subject. Some people have lots of hair, some people have no hair, some people have hair where they shouldn't, some people have hair that always looks perfect and some people have hair that looks like they just rolled out of bed. Some people have lost their hair due to circumstances beyond their control, some people cover their hair, some people should cover their hair and don't...and the list goes on and on.

When I was younger and single, hair cuts could prove to be very traumatic. too many layers, i looked like a chicken, too few layers, I managed to sprout wings...a bad haircut would lead to tears, screaming fights with my mom, because it was her fault after all (isn't everything your mother's fault??) in the early 80's that whole side of your head flip look was in. I just couldn't get it...dam my curls!! my sister had the awesome farrah flip, Marcy and Alicia from my grade had it, i just couldn't get the flip....very frustrating. Though i still look back fondly on those barrettes with the ribbons-that was a classy look. Wish that would come back in style.(but like everything that comes back in style, if you wore it the first time around, you can't wear it the second time around....for example-leggings, miniskirts...etc.) As for haircuts now-once every six months and whatever it looks like, it's alright with me!

Coloring your hair....well, in 10th grade beautiul Roni put that jolene face bleach in her hair, and it made her even more beautiful. Portly Banji but jolene in her hair, it oxidized, turned her hair so sad. What made it even sadder was that i though that if I kept cutting my hair shorter, it would make me look thinner, but basically all it did was make me look like a pyramid.
Perhaps this is why i am afraid to start coloring my hair now....BUT THE GRAY KEEPS MULTIPLYING.....if I keep plucking it out, I am going to need a hair piece, forget about coloring it, there won't be any left!!!

Removing unwanted hair...ahh, laser hair removal. God's gift to women with only daughters-in-law will thank me when they don't have to pluck my whiskers in the nursing is never too early to be considerate...

Happy Friday and have a great weekend!

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

January 6, 2010

the supermarket.

I feel very close to the supermarket. It is like a home away from home for me. I am there all the time. Coincidentally, shoprite is right above my gym. There is nothing like taking a motivating spinning class, getting into the music, feeling the burn, sweating like a pig, totally enjoying my spin bike in the back corner so no one has to go through the emotional pain of seeing me from behind, on a spin bike(which I think just makes it worse...) finishing the class, ready to take on the world just a few ounces lighter...and then going upstairs to shoprite to discover that Entenmanns is 2 for five dollars, hershey bars are 5 packs for 4 dollars, milky way comes in a jar-IT COMES IN A JAR PEOPLE! this is why we need the Biggest loser, this is why we are such a fat country...what does one do with Milky Way in a jar? put in on bread? a muffin? eat it with a spoon..(I am thinking eat it with a spoon while watching the biggest loser).

When I was younger and I first got my driver's license, I was sooo excited to go to Grand Union for my parents. It was like I was running with the olympic torch-we need milk "I'll go!" we are out of paper towels "I'll go!!" It was all so new and glamorous.

Now, not so glamorous. "Banj, soda is on sale at pathmark, powerade is on sale at shoprite, clementines are on sale at stop n shop"- yes folks, there is my whole week right market to market to by a whatever-is-on-sale. Heck, when soda was 59 cents at Fairway, the cashiers started to recognize so sad.

Double coupons, god's gift to the housewife...the only thing more exciting than coupons is when they ring up something wrong and then...THEY HAVE TO GIVE IT TO YOU FOR FREE!!
It's a big thrill, I assure you....

Happy shopping!

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

January 5, 2010 take 2

you know you are getting older when.....

In about 15 minutes I have to leave the house to go to Yeshivat Noam. That is where my boys go to school. I am going there, because last year, I volunteered to help with the yearbook. Ari warned me not to, but I insisted...So now, I am going to help 23 adorable young men with the literary portion of their yearbook. Wait, whose yearbook? my kid's yearbook? my kid is old enough to be in a

Early summer 1992, very late at night, at the home of Aliza Septimus, editor-in-chief of the Stern College for Women and others was a long, long, night. But we did it. I did all of the writing, and I mean ALL of the writing. No hi-tech computers back the old days, I did it all on my ultra-cool, state of the art WORD PROCESSOR (thanks mom and dad it was a great investment.) I got to type the bios of each Stern College woman....those on the baruch hashem club (or Torah Activities Comittee...lots of torah in stern college) those involved with art and science.,those married before they were old enough to drink...we were a fiesty bunch.

Though I don't remember this morning, I distinctly remember club-picture day all those years ago, it was time for the sephardic club to pose...lots of girls with lots of long dark hair, some in need of electrolysis, some not...and I made a really stupid comment (me, make a stupid comment? never...must have been another fat chick in a stern college sweatshirt...) about "smile if sephardic husbands abuse their wives..." needless to say, that day didn't end well for me. I was chock full of apologies...what did i know, I was only 21...bad day all around. Anyway....

So Aliza and I finished the yearbook, very late that night. Did i sleep over? I don't remember, I just know that we did a really great job. Even when I look at that yearbook now, I am still proud of it. I hope that the Yeshivat Noam class of 2010 (holy crap, I am crying....) will be just as proud of their yearbook. And if I can help in anyway, the 400 thousand plus dollars that I have spent on Jack's tuition will be worth every single cent.

Off to school....and yes, Ari, I am wearing a skirt....

Happy Tuesday!

Monday, January 4, 2010

January 4, 2010

Another way you know you are getting older.....

Sleep. I used to sleep a lot. As a child, my dad would have to wake me more than once to get my fat tush out of bed to get ready for school. I would sleep late on the weekends, sleep late on holidays. Would fall asleep on my pile of clothes that I was supposed to be putting away on Saturday afternoons...sleep sleep sleep. There were some weekends in the dorm that I would go to sleep and just sleep all weekend....loved it!

You get married and you still love to sleep. Ari was reminding me that week after we got married, when he was waiting for his career to start and I was the breadwinner (yes, it's true. I was the breadwinner for a brief flash of time...very brief as my social security statements reflect..but I digress..)He would sleep until 10. Ahh the good old his alarm goes off before 6...hate that.

And then, you have your first baby. No sleep. No sleeping when he sleeps because you keep checking to make sure he is breathing. No sleeping period because you are always feeding him or trying to get him to go back to sleep. And then, when you finally do sleep, you can't really sleep because you hear everytime the baby rolls over, or makes a noise, or breathes. sleep. (but Ari...still sleeping....)

And now, that all of your kids are old enough to go to sleep on their own, and later than you do I might add, sleep is not the same. Thoughts run through your head, your spouse falls alseep before you do and snores like a bulldozer (not my spouse, of course...or me for that matter.)keeping you awake, leg cramps, stomach cramps, too hot, too cold, did someone put the chicken away? Did I leave the iron on? No no no, I want some good yummy sleep.

I treated myself to the westin heavenly bed pillows for chanukah. They were supposed to be a joint husband wife gift, but Ari likes the flat horrid pillows reminiscent of his childhood pillows in Monsey(not that there is anything wrong with that.) The pillows help a little. But I just have to assume that sleep will never be the same.

Going to take a nap now...but if I do that, I won't be able to fall asleep later....

Sunday, January 3, 2010

January 3, 2010

Hello. And welcome to my very own piece of narcissism...

So this past weekend my rabbi gave a speech on parenting. We are supposed to be parents and not friends (oops, didn't get the memo on that one.) We are supposed to know how to say "no" (missed that memo as well.) There are two different "staffs" of parenting...the staff of pleasantness and the staff of destruction. I was hoping there would be a third staff, my staff of choice, the staff of Moodiness. Because depending on my moodiness, that is what determines how i parent. For example, we went to a bar mitzva last night, it was so nice and warm with good food and good friends, and while we were at this bar mitzva, matthew, the youngest, was at a sleepover. He went on a sleepover because he is afraid to be left home with his brothers, as they tend to enjoy scaring him(dont ask...) anyway, we come home from the bar mitzva a little before midnight, ari is watching sports with the boys, I go up into bed and begin reading my book and...the phone rings. Phone ringing at midnight is usually not a good thing. With trepidation, I pick up the phone....and its Matthew.
"mom, I can't fall asleep.. Daniel has been sleeping for two hours and i just cant fall asleep."

So, if my staff of moodiness was in the "bad" mode, the evening would've ended rather tragically for poor matthew, BUT, the staff of moodiness was in the "good" mode, so I was able to parent with the staff of pleasantness, allow the poor kid to come home and call it a night.

Now, here is where the bad parenting comes in....Daniel, his friend, is the oldest. Daniel has a schedule, a bed time, a routine...Matthew, on the other hand, is the youngest, he has no bed time because I let him walk all over me, he has a varied schedule and a pitiful routine..which is why the kid couldn't fall asleep earlier-who goes to bed before 12:30 on a saturday night (aside from the mother who is getting old and is unable to stay up late without the aid of pharmacuticals or alcholic libations consumed at the proper intervals....)not matthew or his two older brothers...bad bad parent.

When the boys were little, being a parent was easy-feed, change, play, nap, repeat
As they get older, you want to talk to them, you want to hear about their day, sometimes, you forget to parent because you just enjoy hanging out with them-truth is, how many years do you have when they want to hang out with you? the clock is ticking....I will parent to the best of my ability, with whatever staff I can grab first and i will try not to beat them with it.

Thanks for reading....

Friday, January 1, 2010

January 1, 2010

How was this new years different than others past....well, I am embarrassed to report that after a wonderful evening and a delicious dinner at talias steakhouse (the recession proof menu totally rocked. My "cheap bastard" (said with love) husband was thrilled when we got the 60 dollar bill-60 bucks for two mains, two sides, two sodas, a dessert and a margarita-mine, not his...) anyway, we get home..yada yada yada,I go upstairs at 10 minutes to 12, tell Jack to come and get me when the ball drops so we can ring in the new year thing I know, I wake up, it's one woke me, so i went back to sleep. Pathetic. another sign that i am getting old. Another sign was waking up and helping matthew do his hebrew book report...not recovering from a hangover and trying to remember where i was.

Lets go back to new years 1988..the concord hotel, bottles of free champagne, my parents sending my brother down at 4 in the morning to find me...those were the good old days. Life was simple. I was 17 and think that my parents took us to the concord every year because they felt it was safer to know where we all were. Am i going to be that naive when my boys get older? Maybe they will just take after their father and NEVER DO ANYTHING WRONG...the only time my Ari gave his parents a hard time was when he married me....what can you do. He has never gotten drunk, he has never tried drugs (though neither have I) and he has never woken up not remembering where he was.(and I often say he will only cheat on me if someone comes to the house...) We are only married 14 years...I still have time to corrupt him.

Wishing all 3 of you who read this a happy 2010..filled with good health, good times, good friends and lots of money to pay for school and camp.