Coming to you live.....
A first for me, I am blogging to you live from Rogers stadium in Toronto Canada. The blue jays are beating the Tampa bay rays 5-2 and we are heading into the fifth inning. The kosher food stand only takes cash, which is a problem because we carry very little of it. They no longer have knishes, even though they are listed on the website, so I am hungry and cranky(so what's new) oh wait, jonny Damon just hit his second homerun, so now it's 5-3...please don't be a tie game, please don't go into extra innings..after the day I've had, that might push me over the edge....
For some reason, my kids seem to be on the same bickering schedule as they were on their nursing schedules-every 15-45 minutes...did I do that to them? If I had stretched out their schedules would they fight less? How come the parenting magazines don't have any articles about that? When they get along, my heart swells with joy, and when they bicker...well let's just say I pretend I don't know them. There is a couple on a date behind us and I think the guy has gotten a vasectomy while at the game after listening to my kids fight...but all kids fight, right?
As for Irene...my wonderful neighbor informed me that my basement is a float....I hope my house forgives me for abandoning him in his time of need, and I hope my wonderful neighbor forgives me for leaving her in charge and driving her crazy...but it's only stuff, what matters most is family-and the adorable kids sitting next to me. Oh wait, those are someone else's kids...
Happy Monday...next stop..Rochester..don't be jealous..
Monday, August 29, 2011
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Sunday august 28, 2011
Worst parents ever....
What exactly were husband #1 and I thinking when we decided to leave for our baseball trip at 10 pm last night?? We were thinking. NOTHING!!!!!! I hope everyone reading this is safe and your homes are relatively unscathed, but last night, I made more deals with god than I ever thought possible. One of them, was that I will try not to use inappropriate language so much....but after three harrowing hours, and when I say harrowing, I mean final destination movie harrowing, we got up to our room and the bathroom, aside from the friendly roaches that greeted us, smelled like poop...but I used the inappropriate word, but then justified that it didn't count because I was using it to actually describe the poop, not using it because I dropped or broke something...so I think I'm still in the clear...
I have to give a shout out to husband #1...I don't know how he got us here safely....hope the rest of the trip is calmer....as for the hotel room, I'm grateful that they held it for us, but there is no way I'm paying full price because aside from the roaches and the malodorous odor...they didn't have any more cots and three of us had to share a bed....now that is family bonding...
Stay safe everyone
Happy sunday
What exactly were husband #1 and I thinking when we decided to leave for our baseball trip at 10 pm last night?? We were thinking. NOTHING!!!!!! I hope everyone reading this is safe and your homes are relatively unscathed, but last night, I made more deals with god than I ever thought possible. One of them, was that I will try not to use inappropriate language so much....but after three harrowing hours, and when I say harrowing, I mean final destination movie harrowing, we got up to our room and the bathroom, aside from the friendly roaches that greeted us, smelled like poop...but I used the inappropriate word, but then justified that it didn't count because I was using it to actually describe the poop, not using it because I dropped or broke something...so I think I'm still in the clear...
I have to give a shout out to husband #1...I don't know how he got us here safely....hope the rest of the trip is calmer....as for the hotel room, I'm grateful that they held it for us, but there is no way I'm paying full price because aside from the roaches and the malodorous odor...they didn't have any more cots and three of us had to share a bed....now that is family bonding...
Stay safe everyone
Happy sunday
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Thursday august 25, 2011
Where has the time gone....
Frankly, I'm disappointed in myself that I have not blogged in almost two weeks. I have no explanation..especially since husband #1 is annoyed that I continued blogging past my 40th birthday, and I enjoy annoying him and I've still gone two weeks without a word. Perhaps its because the three aliens have reinvaded my hemisphere of solitude. I've been doing laundry and making meals and cleaning the kitchen and cleaning up those wayward drops of pee that seem to either miss the toilet or remain on the seat because one of the aliens was too lazy to pick it up before he went....and life is back to normal..or as normal as my life is.
And now we have the issue of hurricane Irene...six years ago we decided the boys were too old to keep going to sesame place, hence the ganchrow family baseball road trip began. This year, we are adding the bonus of driving through a hurricane to the itinerary-not enough to see the buffalo bisons, Toronto blue jays, Rochester rodents(can't remember the name of the team) and the Boston red sox, we want to show the boys what it's like to get stranded on the highway in the middle of a hurricane-that will be a true test of my marriage....I can't wait. Hopefully, we will be interviewed by some local yocal news channel and when the reporter asks "why would you choose to leave during the most powerful hurricane of the decade?". I can answer, "well, my husband paid for the tickets already and those minor league games can really cost a bundle.." and then we will offer the reporter something from our white trash cooler...since there is no way Jose that we are paying for any beverages on this trip....ya, as I said, I can't wait.
I'm hoping that god will protect our van, fuzzy dice and all, like he did the Jews in the desert...and that we will make it to our destinations, our motel 6's and all the other fun things we have planned.
And let us all say....amen..
Happy thursday
Frankly, I'm disappointed in myself that I have not blogged in almost two weeks. I have no explanation..especially since husband #1 is annoyed that I continued blogging past my 40th birthday, and I enjoy annoying him and I've still gone two weeks without a word. Perhaps its because the three aliens have reinvaded my hemisphere of solitude. I've been doing laundry and making meals and cleaning the kitchen and cleaning up those wayward drops of pee that seem to either miss the toilet or remain on the seat because one of the aliens was too lazy to pick it up before he went....and life is back to normal..or as normal as my life is.
And now we have the issue of hurricane Irene...six years ago we decided the boys were too old to keep going to sesame place, hence the ganchrow family baseball road trip began. This year, we are adding the bonus of driving through a hurricane to the itinerary-not enough to see the buffalo bisons, Toronto blue jays, Rochester rodents(can't remember the name of the team) and the Boston red sox, we want to show the boys what it's like to get stranded on the highway in the middle of a hurricane-that will be a true test of my marriage....I can't wait. Hopefully, we will be interviewed by some local yocal news channel and when the reporter asks "why would you choose to leave during the most powerful hurricane of the decade?". I can answer, "well, my husband paid for the tickets already and those minor league games can really cost a bundle.." and then we will offer the reporter something from our white trash cooler...since there is no way Jose that we are paying for any beverages on this trip....ya, as I said, I can't wait.
I'm hoping that god will protect our van, fuzzy dice and all, like he did the Jews in the desert...and that we will make it to our destinations, our motel 6's and all the other fun things we have planned.
And let us all say....amen..
Happy thursday
Friday, August 12, 2011
Friday august 12,2011
Me and plaxico....
Week 7
So this week started out with husband #1 and I going to a lecture on narcissism. The man spoke about being nicer and friendlier to people, holding the door open for others, but really concentrating on improving the relationship with your spouse. Well folks, when the lecture was over, the same people who don't say hello to me because I am so thin that I'm invisible, still ignored me...I held the door open for about thirty people and no one said thank you and then husband #1 almost left me to walk home in the torrential rain. Basically proving my point that these lectures are ridiculous and you should just stick to what you know....
What I know is that I listen to waayyy to much mike and the mad dog when husband #1 is driving and on our way back from our "mini-moon"(which is code for going to a hotel for one night...but it was lovely) we were listening to mike interview plaxico burress..the newest member of the jets football organization. So I am now going to tie in the lecture on narcissism and plaxico burress and banji ganchrow.
Plaxico was asked if he learned anything in jail..well, I thought he was going to say "yes, never bend down to pick up your toothbrush" or "if you are going to carry an unregistered fire arm, don't shoot yourself in the foot"....but instead he spoke of the importance of family. Now, my family has been away from me for only seven weeks...what have I learned? I learned it is possible to go seven weeks with pulling your hair out and wanting to lock yourself in a closet and scream at the top of your lungs.....no, just kidding...I learned that camp should be longer than seven and a half weeks....no, just kidding...I didn't really learn anything..I'm hoping the time away will make them better kids, I mean make me a better, calmer mom...and if it didn't, perhaps I will shoot myself in the foot, go to jail for two years and then get a really big contract with a sports team.
Wait, I think I got off track somewhere....oh well, I tried.
Happy Friday...
Week 7
So this week started out with husband #1 and I going to a lecture on narcissism. The man spoke about being nicer and friendlier to people, holding the door open for others, but really concentrating on improving the relationship with your spouse. Well folks, when the lecture was over, the same people who don't say hello to me because I am so thin that I'm invisible, still ignored me...I held the door open for about thirty people and no one said thank you and then husband #1 almost left me to walk home in the torrential rain. Basically proving my point that these lectures are ridiculous and you should just stick to what you know....
What I know is that I listen to waayyy to much mike and the mad dog when husband #1 is driving and on our way back from our "mini-moon"(which is code for going to a hotel for one night...but it was lovely) we were listening to mike interview plaxico burress..the newest member of the jets football organization. So I am now going to tie in the lecture on narcissism and plaxico burress and banji ganchrow.
Plaxico was asked if he learned anything in jail..well, I thought he was going to say "yes, never bend down to pick up your toothbrush" or "if you are going to carry an unregistered fire arm, don't shoot yourself in the foot"....but instead he spoke of the importance of family. Now, my family has been away from me for only seven weeks...what have I learned? I learned it is possible to go seven weeks with pulling your hair out and wanting to lock yourself in a closet and scream at the top of your lungs.....no, just kidding...I learned that camp should be longer than seven and a half weeks....no, just kidding...I didn't really learn anything..I'm hoping the time away will make them better kids, I mean make me a better, calmer mom...and if it didn't, perhaps I will shoot myself in the foot, go to jail for two years and then get a really big contract with a sports team.
Wait, I think I got off track somewhere....oh well, I tried.
Happy Friday...
Saturday, August 6, 2011
Saturday august 6,2011
Lazy week 6....
Yes, I will admit I have been lazy. I haven't blogged all week and even though husband #1 is happy about that, I would like to apologize to those of you that support my narcissism..
So if this was week 6, that means that week 7 is about to begin, which means that week 7 1/2 is around the corner and the boys will be back. With 6 trunks of laundry. How can you miss your kids and not want them to come home all at the same time? Does that question mean I'm a bad mother? I've so enjoyed not screaming so loud that it feels my head will pop off of my shoulders....I enjoy not doing laundry three times a week and running a 24 hour diner....Is that wrong? Enough of the hypotheticals....here's the week in review...unless you've already fallen asleep...
Husband #1 and walked the high line and then went on the circle line...very touristy...and surprisingly enjoyable. When we told son#1 where we were, he thought we were kidding as he is used to his father being on the upstairs couch watching some sort of sporting event, and his mother being down in the bunker watching reruns of law & order and ironing....
One day this week I had the pleasure of visiting the museum of tv&radio, where I got to watch old episodes of mad about you, fantasy island, I love Lucy and the intellectual classic Melrose Place. Now that was good tv...
Though the highlight of the week was discovering that all of the annoying squirrels in teaneck are not Jewish. How do I know this? Well, the package I left for son #1( don't worry, there was stuff in there for the other 2..) was attacked by a squirrel. The kind gentleman who transports these nut-free packages for me sent me an email with the news of the attack....upon arriving at the scene, I discovered that the anti-semetic
squirrel neatly ate one corner of the pull apart challah(including part of the tin it came in..) he also ate part of the envelope and letter that was going to son #1, but did not touch the pound of cookies or any of the snacks going to son #3....clearly not a Jewish squirrel....I even took a picture of the challah(since husband #1 would not let me cut off the nibbled portion and send the rest up to camp) to show the boys when they came home, because son #1 is convinced that I got hungry and just blamed in on the unsuspecting rodent...nice, right?
And then we get to the weekend, where the holycrapiam40 part comes in....my dear friend from the island of long came to town for the weekend and she gave me a cortisone injection for the mean angry neuroma in my foot...as some of you may recall, though most of you don't care because, frankly, why should you, I had one of these shots in December before the half marathon and it held up pretty well until a few weeks ago, but now that I have accepted the age of the everything-is-falling-apart, it's good to have a podiatrist as a friend, who also takes your insurance...and hopefully knows what she is doing(just kidding my friend, my foot is still attached so so far, so good....)
Here's wishing all of you a pain free week filled with friends who can take away the pain if you end up having any....
Happy sunday
Yes, I will admit I have been lazy. I haven't blogged all week and even though husband #1 is happy about that, I would like to apologize to those of you that support my narcissism..
So if this was week 6, that means that week 7 is about to begin, which means that week 7 1/2 is around the corner and the boys will be back. With 6 trunks of laundry. How can you miss your kids and not want them to come home all at the same time? Does that question mean I'm a bad mother? I've so enjoyed not screaming so loud that it feels my head will pop off of my shoulders....I enjoy not doing laundry three times a week and running a 24 hour diner....Is that wrong? Enough of the hypotheticals....here's the week in review...unless you've already fallen asleep...
Husband #1 and walked the high line and then went on the circle line...very touristy...and surprisingly enjoyable. When we told son#1 where we were, he thought we were kidding as he is used to his father being on the upstairs couch watching some sort of sporting event, and his mother being down in the bunker watching reruns of law & order and ironing....
One day this week I had the pleasure of visiting the museum of tv&radio, where I got to watch old episodes of mad about you, fantasy island, I love Lucy and the intellectual classic Melrose Place. Now that was good tv...
Though the highlight of the week was discovering that all of the annoying squirrels in teaneck are not Jewish. How do I know this? Well, the package I left for son #1( don't worry, there was stuff in there for the other 2..) was attacked by a squirrel. The kind gentleman who transports these nut-free packages for me sent me an email with the news of the attack....upon arriving at the scene, I discovered that the anti-semetic
squirrel neatly ate one corner of the pull apart challah(including part of the tin it came in..) he also ate part of the envelope and letter that was going to son #1, but did not touch the pound of cookies or any of the snacks going to son #3....clearly not a Jewish squirrel....I even took a picture of the challah(since husband #1 would not let me cut off the nibbled portion and send the rest up to camp) to show the boys when they came home, because son #1 is convinced that I got hungry and just blamed in on the unsuspecting rodent...nice, right?
And then we get to the weekend, where the holycrapiam40 part comes in....my dear friend from the island of long came to town for the weekend and she gave me a cortisone injection for the mean angry neuroma in my foot...as some of you may recall, though most of you don't care because, frankly, why should you, I had one of these shots in December before the half marathon and it held up pretty well until a few weeks ago, but now that I have accepted the age of the everything-is-falling-apart, it's good to have a podiatrist as a friend, who also takes your insurance...and hopefully knows what she is doing(just kidding my friend, my foot is still attached so so far, so good....)
Here's wishing all of you a pain free week filled with friends who can take away the pain if you end up having any....
Happy sunday
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