Saturday, January 21, 2012

Vacation post..not a repeat...

Saturday, January 21, 2012

It's another saturday night..husband #1 took the boys to a Nets game, courtesy of cheap tickets on stubhub(is there any other kind of ticket?) and i'm home doing typical Cinderella stuff. Many of you think that I should get a job to contribute to the financial well being of my family. To you, I say..bite me. I am currently wearing a 22 year old tshirt that I think i bought in great adventure with my friend Deva and pants that i got at target on sale...I bought 48 boxes of pasta when they were only 49 cents each and the black dress I wear to various weddings and bat mitzvahs is the same one I wore when i got married..(well, I didn't wear it to my wedding..i wore it the night after my wedding..insert lewd comment here)..

Anyway, the one good thing that husband #1's parents taught him(see, giving credit where credit is due) was the importance of taking a vacation without your children(refrain from comment here..). I have been quite lucky that for the past few years, we have taken some really nice vacations sans kids. But last year I realized that son #1 will be going to Israel in the blink of an eye, and since he is a son and not a daughter, that, I hear from many wise moms-of-boys, is the beginning of the end(good end for the son, bad end for the mom)And that is when I broke the bad news to husband #1- no more vacations without the kids. They are coming with us..wherever we go. I don't care if they fight, throw things at each other, yell, scream, wrestle..goddamit, those kids are coming with us because we love them and soon, they will only want to be with their in laws and we will never see them again unless we end up in the hospital(god forbid) or beg and plead for them to come for a visit...not a long visit, just enough for them to drop off the grandkids and go on vacation. Wow, that was some tangent.

We are taking the kids on vacation...the past two years, our vacation involved son #1 and I raising over 7 thousand dollars for chai lifeline so we could do the half marathon. This year, we are taking them on a cruise. A classy, white trashy, man do i look skinny Carnival cruise. Yes, Carnival owns the cruise line that sunk. Yes, i saw the pictures...yes, I am still going. No, I will not be drunk the whole time(alcohol is extra, silly, and if I am shlepping 24 cans of fanta for husband #1, do you really think I can spend money on alcohol???) I am hoping the boys will bond and realize how lucky they are to be going on a vacation and spending it together..I am hoping that they will take a vacation from fighting and won't throw each other over board(though I know there are security cameras everywhere when i tried to get rid of husband #1 the first time we cruised...) I am hoping they appreciate the fact that their father and I are giving up alone time, so we can take in all of the precious moments that life gives us, but that pass all too quickly.

Who am I kidding...I hope they find friends and leave me alone for a few hours...

Happy Saturday

Monday, January 9, 2012

monday january 9, 2012

excuse me, im having a hot flash, is this seat taken?

Before i begin my "holier than thou" monologue, this blog does not apply to any one related to the person who made the simcha or the people who did the right thing, and you know who you are....and here i go...

This past sunday I attended the festive circumcision of a young man who was born into one of the most amazing families I know. Wonderful aunts and uncles, incredible grandparents..the whole 9 yards. Yet, when i entered the room where breakfast was being served, i was surprised to find most of those people standing, along with various middle-age to elderly friends and other assorted relatives of the family. And while these kind older people were standing (and when i say older, i dont mean they look older, they all look fabulous, just, chronologically, they happen to be older...) there seem to be an overabundance of young people sitting. And when i say young people, i mean people under the age of 6 and their parents, who are under the age of 30.

This brings me back to my self righteous opinion of "who is a good person." Is a good person someone who covers their hair and doesn't make out with their husband in public(yuck..sorry husband #1) or is a good person someone who gives their seat, and the seat of their snotty nosed child(or in the case of this particular function, snotty nosed children) to an elderly couple who can barely stand...hmmmm, let me think...Yes, i know this was a sunday morning circumcision and you need to get the kids out of the house, but, right is right people. There are 50 gray haired young folks looking for seats, get your kids up and do the right thing...its not like you are still pregnant, you are nursing the baby at the table for gods is born, give up your seat!!

I firmly maintain that if your child is not yet old enough for you to cut his hair, he should not have his own seat when there are older people standing. If your child does not know the difference between a pancake and a napkin(and is happy to chew on either) he should not have a just saying....I did not know the majority of the people at this simcha, probably because they arent old enough to attend the pre-menopause support group that i attend, but i was not very impressed.

Man i feel better. Yes, i know i need professional help....

Happy Monday

Sunday, January 1, 2012

Sunday January 1,2012

It's 2012??

I am not quite sure how we got to 2012. I mean, I know how we got here, but I still can't believe that another year has gone by. Looking back, I still remember thinking that I was going to be 30 in the year 2000 and that seemed like a million years away and now it's 2012 and I'm way past 30...(but still look like I'm 28 and act like I'm 12...) I was speaking with someone over the weekend who was saying that every day feels like the same thing..over and over again, truth be told, to a certain extent, she is right, but with all of the crappy things that have happened to people I care about this year, I will take the monotony over uncertainty any day(of course I say this as I am lounging in bed while husband #1 is playing the role of referee while son #3 is screaming his brains out and sons 1 and 2 are running for cover..) There is something to be said for knowing what comes next, or at least thinking we know what comes next...

And as I watched the new weight watchers commercial at the stroke of midnight(god bless that Jennifer Hudson...can't wait to see what song she sings when she gets pregnant again..), I thought of my resolutions for the new year. We had our "young friends" over last night(and it got pretty crazy with three of their kids over..) and I asked my friend what her resolution was and she replied "not to yell so much." And that is when it hit me. I am not making any new years resolutions because if I have learned anything in my 41 years of life, it's that I suck at the follow through.

I would love not yell so much and have my kids think I am Mary Sunshine...but that's not going to happen. If anything, my mood disorder keeps them on their toes. I would love to be a nicer person, but I don't really like a lot of people because they continually disappoint you, so scratch that resolution. Basically, the only things I can resolve is that I will not kill anyone, on purpose anyway, I will not have an affair(too much effort and really, one is enough, husband that is, not affair, just to be clear) and I will try my best to try my best....that is all I can do.

Wishing all of you a happy and healthy 2012, filled with all the things you wish for yourselves...

Happy Sunday