And then there was Willis...

Part of turning 40 has re-emphasized the phrase "life is short." Every time something hurts or I don't feel right, I consult my medical team on google to try and determine which ailment is going to get me this week.  This is not always the smartest thing to do, but it makes me feel that I am being proactive.  When I heard the news that Mr. Drummond, from Different Strokes fame, had died, a show that was on when I was a kid, the first words out of my mouth were "Willis is the only one left!"  After pausing a moment, and checking google for symptoms of chest pains and dry mouth, I then recalled that I think Mrs. Garrett from Facts of Life was still alive(and I believe she worked for the Drummonds..), but I wasn't really sure and I didn't want to check because then that would be really depressing. It's like watching reruns of the Odd Couple (which I did all day, new years day, man that show is still funny). The Odd Couple is dead.  That is just so sad.

The reality is, some of these folk were in their late 80's and 90's, which, of course, isn't old if you are say 86, but, unfortunately, there are some who died way too young.  OK, this is getting depressing. As long as my girls Blair, Jo, Tootie...are still ok, and i hope that they are..I can continue on.

Here is wishing those of you who are going away a safe and wonderful trip, those of you who are staying home a safe and wonderful stacation and good health and peace to all.  And, just as a side point, it really does take "different strokes to rule the world, yes it does..."

Happy Thursday

For those of you too young or too old not to catch the tv references...google them...:)

happiness is named Omar

Due to a good friend of mine who wanted me to join her in "latin Funk" class at The Gym(insert evil sounding music here) I went back to the scene of the crime...the building full of skinny people. Surprisingly, I was warmly greeted by many of my smaller friends(cause every girl is happy when there is someone fatter than them in the same room...unfortunately for me, that doesn't happen at The Gym) and my hives subsided quickly.

In walks Omar. This adorable smiling african american cutie patootie who has the most adorable bedonkadonk. Today he was wearing white boxers, in the past, he has worn plaid. But whatever color they are, they make me smile. Because Omar makes me smile.  As he plays his "latin funk" music, which is usually in some form of spanish, he sings along to all of the songs and does moves that husband #1 has yet to learn...and it all makes me happy. He breaks into these epileptic seizures of pirouttes and leaps and jumps and I stand there in awe of his energy and enthusiasm.   Due to my self imposed anxiety, the last couple of weeks have wreaked havoc on my body, my will power and my ability to relax. In 50 minutes, Omar managed to loosen me up...though, as my friend can attest, I was not loose enough to shimmy my shoulders(though, because of gravity and my age and my lack of will power, other parts of me shimmy without my wanting them to...) He exudes this happiness that makes me ask "what is he on, and how can I get me some of that?"

So my new years resolution is to be like Omar. I have no idea how I am going to do that, but it is more realistic then saying my resolution is going to be going back to The Gym....unless, of course, my friend will take me again....

Happy Monday

Happy Freaking New Year!

I can't believe another year has gone by. And what a year it has been. Son#1 got to meet Adrian Peterson(vikings), son #2 got to meet Steve Jackson(rams), son #3 started learning for his bar mitzva and husband #1 figured out how to connect over 200 feet of extension cord to our neighbors generator.

Yes, it has been quite the year. Another year older, another year less patient and another year closer to having zero editing mechanism like Grandma Sylvia, she should rest in peace. Have I learned anything? hmm, probably not-oh wait, I learned that I cannot change the weather forecast no matter how many times I yell at Lee Goldberg. I learned that driving with son #1 is less stressful if I have taken an ambien first(don't judge me..he is the one driving, not me..)I learned that you cannot stop gray hair from growing, even if you keep pulling them out and I learned that the snickerdoodle recipe on the side of the duncan hines yellow cake mix makes everyone in my house happy-a culinary feat not easily accomplished...(though I am not sure that counts as a culinary feat...)

Every new years eve I think of my friend Deva and the Concord hotel..the band playing, the cocktail party, the champagne, the imperial room..ah, good times. New years eve is different now...I'm going to son #3's hockey game and hoping to stay up past 9:30...but it is all good. We will all be together. I have a bottle of champagne that i will probably end up drinking by myself, in my bunker, while the boys watch ESPN with their father and there is nothing wrong with that. I think...

May 2013(holy crap 2013-seriously?!?!?!) bring us all good health, happiness, wealth, success, safedriving, wonderful vacations, lots and lots of laughter...and all we wish for ourselves and our families. May those we know(and don't know) who suffered terrible losses this year find comfort and peace. And let us say...amen. 

Happy New Year and Happy Sunday..man, i can't wait until football season is over so I can get my tv back.....

good days and bad days...

During a typical day, we have many emotions. Happy, sad, angry, frustrated, scared..these past few days have been a culmination of all of those.  My community has lost two precious young people, Sandy Hook elementary has lost twenty precious souls..grief is not meant to be measured. We all respond differently and in the end, tears are tears. We will never know why bad things happen to good people...we just need to take a deep breath and have faith. Be grateful for the good and not dwell on questions that we cannot answer. Easier said then done.

I must maintain that laughter is the best medicine(well, narcotics are probably the best medicine, and now that medical marijuana is legal, perhaps THAT is the best medicine..but that's for another time.)  Husband #1 and I went on a mini-vaca to the windy city this past weekend. It was a much needed reprieve.  He even sprung for the 25 dollars it cost to bring a suitcase. Which he needed. For his suit.  To wear once.  In case the sabbath police came and arrested him for only wearing pants and a shirt to synagogue. I was perfectly fine with my carry on that i had purchased for my trip to Vegas..but i digress. Ladies, what do men pack on a trip?  socks, underwear, a shirt, a pair of pants. Men are easy. (though, i did become friends and relatives with a man who wears very lovely socks, so lovely, in fact, that I am thinking of sprucing up husband #1's wardrobe with some..) 15 minutes before candle lighting, I hear screaming in the basement...worried that something mightve happened to husband #1, i rush down the stairs(I really did rush).  Looking at me, with sheer terror, he says "I forgot to pack my underwear."  Really? you forgot underwear?  I did laundry 3 days early so you would have enough underwear and wouldn't have to go into your reserves(yes, he has reserves)(I'm fully aware that I don't work and laundry is what primarily occupies my time, but I never do our laundry that early in the week.) Poor guy. No underwear. What's a kind, compassionate, loving wife to do?  Laugh. At him. Laugh a lot. And then go to walgreens to buy him some underwear-so not in the budget after springing for the suitcase. But even though we were staying with people that we love and feel totally comfortable with..you just can't borrow someone else's underwear. I had to tell the lady in walgreens the story...so then we laughed again. Sorry husband #1, it's been a tough week. But thanks for taking me to Chicago...

Happy Tuesday

im a turkey..your a turkey

Thanksgiving.  I have fond memories of thanksgiving at 816 avenue K in Brooklyn.  My dad's parents house. We were greeted with chopped liver and crackers..stuffing and kishska from L&E..really good stuffing.  So good, that fat Banji wasn't really allowed to eat it so she had to surreptitiously sneak it in when no one was looking...good times. Memories are triggered by tastes and smells...all I have to do is look at my dining room set to have those memories, as it is the same one that was in my grandparents house.  Times were simple then, uncomplicated. No horrific storms or rockets being launched. No family squabbles. Or maybe there were and I was just protected from all of that.  Who knows..we remember what we want to and forget what we want to (those, as I get older I forget things that I dont want to, but my aging brain isn't allowing me to remember...)

Im not sure why people make a big deal about thanksgiving..as orthodox jews we seem to celebrate it every weekend..though, at shoprite, they only think the kosher folks are worth a free chicken. Subtle anti-semitism at its best.  I spent hundreds of dollars a week at that store, and Im only eligible for a free chicken. A small, pathetic, frozen chicken. For thanksgiving. The holiday based around a turkey.  Really?  I would boycott shoprite, but then I wouldn't have access to my supply of Tab...though they haven't had that recently either so maybe someone is trying to tell me something....and Drakes is out of business so husband #1 is now out of his major food group-coffee cakes...is there a rehab for that?

In any event, the point of thanksgiving, aside from being with relatives you don't like, is to be thankful.  So Im thankful for my beautiful boys(when they are not fighting), for husband #1 for filling my car up with gas, on an odd day, when I only had 4 miles left to go, for my home, which is still standing, for friends who cheer me up on my birthday which really didn't happen because we didn't have power so im not actually a year older, and for all of the blessings God has given me. May you all be blessed and be thankful for those blessings as well.

Happy Wednesday and here's to Peace......

losing power never gets old....

So after 5 1/2 days without power, the lights have once again been turned on in my town...a town filled with so many different kinds of people. And before i begin this rant, I am fully aware of the devastation that sandy has caused and it breaks my heart that people have lost their homes and don't even have socks, when my kids keep leaving their socks all over the house-power, no power, it doesn't matter..My boys just assumed that laundry service would continue when we had no power and kept using different towels and wearing different sweatpants and then complained to the hired help(me) when they noticed supplies were running low. yessirree-i am one lucky gal. During this period of cold and darkness, the best comes out in people...a friend hosted 30-40 "refugees"..family, friends, friends of family, kids of all ages...everytime she opened the door i was waiting for her to hold her torch up and say "give me your tired, your poor." She and her husband were just awesome AND, her hair always looked good(which is really all that matters..) One across the street neighbor could not have been more sincere about wanting my entire family to come move in. And I would've taken her up on it but I still wanted her to be my neighbor, so instead, she had the important job of guarding my leftover chinese food so I had what to eat for breakfast each morning...yes, i ate it for breakfast. and it was delicious and i LOVE kosher express in Fair Lawn... My other across the street neighbor let my kids and i come over for quality internet and schmoozing time, and i , in order to repay the kindness, gave her kids leftover noodles-hey, it was the best i could do, and what kid doesn't love noodles? My next door neighbor, for the time being, gave us the biggest gift of all. The gift of letting us hook up our sump pump to their generator. Turns out that sandy's plans did not include so much water(just scary ass wind gusts....)so my boys, who don't know how to use an oven, do laundry or take out the garbage, figured out we could hook the tv up to the outlet...thats right folks, no heat, food in all the fridges bad, but we had tv for the entire blackout. Kids with generators would come over to watch tv in our cold dark home, because where there is tv, there is love....and good snacks, if you could find them... And then there is the whole category of people who "invite" the whole neighborhood to come over, but then pray you don't actually show up because they don't want you charging things in their outlets. Those people are poopies...and thats all i have to say about that. But the last issue i would like to touch upon is my birthday that wasn't...ok, it was on thursday, I am 39 for the third time...I did have some great friends come over and do lemon shots with me in the middle of the day...infront of my kids...but who cares, right? it kept us all warm and I felt the love. (One of my friends also got me a wrap that did actually keep me warm and it's yummy) And from my special children, I got a pillow that you can wrap into different configurations...like a head rest for the plane(we don't go on planes) and pillow to keep your head comfy on your couch(they dont let me on the couch) a pillow to sit on if the floor is too hard(umm, circumference of pillow vs circumference of my bedonkadonk-excuse me, does this come in a bigger size?) But, it was the thought that counts...and its always appreciated when someone gives you some thought... So as my 39th for the 3rd time birthday comes to an end...I am grateful for hot showers even with no power, garbage pick up during a black out, and friends that make you feel they really care about you...and my greatest gifts of all, my boys....even though i wanted to kill them several times these past few days...life is good here's hoping your lives get back to normal as soon as possible and that everyone gets their power back and that romney pulls it off this week so i can get a generator instead of giving all of my money to the government(well, husband #1's money..as I am just a house servant....) Happy Sunday!!

the blog before the storm....

I am nauseous. Literally and physically nauseous.  I have every worst cast scenario running through my head..a floating ironing board in my basement..the roof blowing off of my house..windows shattering. If i watch one more weather forecast, i might throw up.

But ask me what the "men" in my house are doing.  Are they holding my hand and telling me it will all be ok?  Are they helping me get all the laundry done so we have plenty of clean clothes for when we don't have power until December?  No, they aren't. They are watching football. All of them. On different tvs. Just a typical Sunday in my house.  Good thing Sandy wasn't forecast for today, because then there would be no football. And the "men" would be sad.  Boo freakin hoo.

I know I can't control this storm, or any storm for that matter, so I continue to do the things i can control-change linens, make beds, organize cabinets, drive everyone in my house and those visiting to watch football insane. No more news for me...it will be what it will be...Governor Christie told me(and everyone else watching) that if I have time, i should pray for the storm to go east...so that is what i am doing now.

Hope you all stay safe, with power, with patience and with help from God.

Happy Sunday