thursday june 24, 2010

the chick that ate long island

the whole ganchrow family is piling into the minivan and heading to the illustrious, mysterious, fashionable, fabulous five towns for the weekend. we have a bar mitzva there that we are very much looking forward to and are staying with friends of ours that we like a lot. now, my experience with the five towns has not always been pleasant. there was the time i went out there with my friend to find a dress for son #1's bar mitzva and i was laughed out of each store...literally.."you think you are going to find a dress here? have you seen your hips? mwa ha ha (evil laugh)"

there have also been times i have been out there and have had a very pleasant, stress-free time..but, truthfully, i am a little nervous about this weekend. i can be perfectly honest in admiting that i have not lost the 10 pounds i have put on since the bar mitzva(but am happy to say that i still have not put back all 25), and i am afraid that i am going to exceed the weight limit to walk into the young israel of woodmere. I am afraid that the skinny women will run for their lives in fear that i might eat them if i get hungry. these are very real fears for me. forget about being self deprecating, what happens if i sit down in synagogue and break the chair? what happens if i can't fit into the chair? what happens if i walk into lunch and the caterer rushes over to me and whispers "we only have 50 pounds of chopped liver, please dont eat all of it..."
i am having a panic attack just thinking about it.....

self confidence is not something that comes easily to me(or comes to me at all, for that matter) but i have to hope that maybe the skinny minnies will look at me and think " man, she must be in a good mood all the time because she is never hungry, i think i will go over to her and be her friend..." or "wow, i really wish i could fit into chicos clothing, maybe i will go and eat some donuts..."

a big girl can dream......

happy thursday....